Aug 09

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – Film Review


The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are back with fresh visual effects, and a fresh wardrobe. Instead of the foam rubber suits we saw in previous live-action movies, motion-capture effects are used this time, and Megan Fox takes over April O’Neil duties as she tries to crack the Foot Clan’s plans on the havoc they are giving to New York City. In doing so, she of course stumbles upon some vigilantes that stop the Foot from whatever heist they are performing, finding out they are giant, mutant ninja turtles that she might have connection with in the past. They all then take on Shredder, who has a diabolical plan for New York City. Let’s do it.

So much backlash with this movie that I wanted to remain optimistic about it…fuck me. Yes, this movie was pretty much a shit sandwich, but not a complete shit sandwich. More like a half of one. What keeps the movie from having Turtle fans walk out, is the turtles themselves. Whoever wrote the characters, got them down to a tee, and amplified those character traits we know a little bit. I didn’t mind they were over-sized ogre looking Turtles, and I didn’t mind that they had added on accessories to their wardrobe. The camaraderie¬†and humor from the Turtles was nailed pretty perfectly, as for the rest of the movie and characters…no.

Megan Fox as April is just ridiculous casting. I think Michael Bay told the director to have her breathe heavily throughout the movie, because it seemed like she was out of breath more times than she had lame dialogue to spit out. Shredder was all very lame as well, but at least William¬†Fitchner wasn’t playing him. Robot Shredder had nothing to give villain-wise, and I hope if there is a sequel, he leaves the jaeger suit at home.

Other supporting characters like Will Arnett and Whoopi Goldberg are just as boring as they can be. I like Will Arnett a lot, and he didn’t make me laugh once in this movie. It’s like the director put the camera in his face and said, “Say something funny Will!” And Will just couldn’t do it. Bet that paycheck was nice though, ay Will?

Fans of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles will most likely hate this movie, even though it isn’t as bad as people predicted. The Turtles are great, but the story is just a mix of other movie plots, and it ends just like another blockbuster that came out a couple of years ago. Couldn’t believe that it played out the almost exact same way, which just shows lazy writing and lazy film making. Check out my video review below to hear more about the movie. Let me know if you saw it.

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